Underwear

I know I should not be writing my blog while I am at work, but I am a bit distracted.  You see, my underwear is riding up my butt.  Men don't seem to have this problem, and if they do, they just grab a handful of undie and yank it out.  Women, oh, women have to be more discrete.
So then I sit there and I squirm trying to figure out how to rectify the problem in an inconspicuous manner.  In our office we have open cubicles with only two walls and not private at all.  Should I just man up and just yank it out?  NO.  I move around in my seat just hoping that if I move just right it will release its self from its hiding place in my crack and give me some peace and let me get back to work.  Nope, not working.
Then I stand up and stretch, look around and very quickly pull that sucker out of there.  Very proud of how sly I was.  No one noticed.  When I bent to sit back down.... Back in the crack.  Now dang it, I am getting mad, I have work to do.  So now I am on a mission.  I trek off to the bathroom.  I am going to take care of this pantie problem if it is the last thing I do.  I pull up my skirt, pull that sucker from it's resting place and try to outsmart this annoying piece of cloth.  Light bulb!  Maybe if I just don't pull them up all the way, it will give the caboose a little extra wiggle room.  So I straighten my skirt, smile at myself in the mirror (for I have just outsmarted  a pair of underwear).  Head back to my desk and by the time I get there....you guessed it.  Back in the crack.

Today is not an unusual day, it is a typical day.  Underwear always rides and if it is not the underwear, it is my bra itching or riding up in the back, or a tag is scratchy.  I guess this blog is intended for those who design this stuff.  It would really be nice if you could make some panties that weren't crack lovers.  Bras that didn't itch and stayed put.  Socks that did not have the seam around the toe.  Clothing that had removable tags, and so on.  You designers can not count on me to do it because I am a procrastinator and will probably never get around to it.